Loyalty

Truthfully, I've always had a problem with secrets. Not all secrets, just those that dealt with someone I was close to. People have always come to me and told me things in confidence, and I try really really hard not to break that confidence. But I find it really hard, when a secret has to do with one of my family members or friends. I've always felt a sharp sense of loyalty to my family/friends, and if someone told me something that I felt that my family/friend needed to know, then that's where it's always been hard for me.

I've kept things "hidden" all these years because I didn't feel like it was my place to tell the people I feel loyal to. But deep down, I feel like I'm betraying them by not telling them what I know. SO...how do you live with something like that? Do you have a loyalty to the person that told you the secret, or someone that it affects? It would be easy if it was a matter of life or death, but if it's not? Ok, just for an example....

If you were sworn to secrecy, and told by a friend that your sister's boyfriend was cheating on her, do you break that secrecy and tell your sister, or do you just not get involved? See for me personally, I would tell my sister what I heard, because I'd feel she had a right to know....and because if it was the other way around, I'd want to know. But what happens when it isn't something so simple? I have one secret in mind, that I've always felt I was betraying someone that I love. I know that it doesn't make any difference of whether I tell this person or not, because it happened a long time ago. BUT just the fact that I know about it and they don't, bothers me. I was never sworn to secrecy by the person who told me, but it was one of those things where when I heard about it, I just knew I couldn't tell the person it involved because I didn't want to hurt anyone. So in a way, I'm the one who made it a secret.

I know none of this makes sense to those reading this, I just have this mumbo jumbo in my mind and I feel bad having it in my mind. I don't know....maybe it's just best not to say anything at this point.