"Some people come into your life for a lifetime and some come for a season. You have to know which is which. I put everybody that comes into my life in the category of a tree.
Some people are leaves on a tree. The wind blows, they go to the left. The wind blows from the other way, they go to the right. They are just unstable. You can't count on them for nothing. All they ever do is take from that tree. What you need to understand about a leaf is that it has a season. It'll wither and die and blow away. There ain't no need to be praying over a leaf to be resurrected. When it's dead it's gone. Let it go! Some people are like that. All the leaf ever does is cool you off every now and then. If you're grown, you know what I'm talking about, because you can call them in the middle of the night and get cooled off. That's the leaf people. They come to take.
Then there are people like a branch. You got to be careful with branch people. They come in all different shapes and sizes. You never know how strong they will be in your life. So my advice is to tip out on it slowly. When you're going out on a limb, don't put too much weight on it at once, because it can fall and leave you high and dry. Sometimes, you have to wait for a branch to grow up before it can hold all of the things you want to share with it.
Finally, there are people who are like roots at the bottom of the tree. If you find yourself two or three people in your entire lifetime that are like the roots, then you are blessed. The roots don't care nothing about being seen. All they're there to do is hold that tree up, to make sure it stays in the air. It comes from the earth to give that tree everything it needs. That's what relationships should be about. That's what you need, people who want to be in your life for the right reasons.
If somebody wants to walk out of your life, you've got to LET THEM GO! When you learn to love yourself, you will end up giving standards to everyone around you. Again, I repeat with emphasis, if they don't meet those standards, you have to let them go, because they might be a leaf. And forgive them with all your might" -Medea(Tyler Perry)
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
What is your purpose in life?
If you took the time to think about this question, what would your answer be? I am reading a self help book and it says that one of the main things to do, is to find your purpose in life. I had to think about that long and hard. I think "my" purpose is about being the best person that I can be and making an impression in the world and the people I encounter on a daily basis. I've learned to totally change my life around, so that I can go out of my way to do good things for other people.
For example, I smile constantly at strangers. I can't tell you how many people I've had tell me, that I've lightened their day because I smiled at them, especially elderly people who are treated with a lack of respect and kindness by our younger generation. I also try to pick things up that have fallen off the shelves in a store, and I stack the dishes and wipe my table off at a restaurant after I finish eating. I also try really hard to allow drivers around me, the opportunity to turn or merge infront of me, and I always stop to allow people to cross the road (as long as it is safe to do so). And I'm always willing to help people in need.
I also tend to notice good things that others do, and I appreciate them, even if it doesn't effect me personally. One day while at a liquer store, I was sitting in the car while Mark went inside. A man walked past me, bent over and picked up a big trashcan that had fallen over, before he went inside. It absolutely stunned me. I hadn't even noticed that the trashcan was laying on it's side, and even if I had, I'm not sure that I would have picked it up. He did such a tiny little act of goodness, and even if no one else noticed, I did and I felt an odd feeling of respect towards him. I also love when people go out of their way to hold the door open for someone else. It's such a small thing to do, but it can totally make an impression on someone's life.
Hmmm...a question worth pondering.
For example, I smile constantly at strangers. I can't tell you how many people I've had tell me, that I've lightened their day because I smiled at them, especially elderly people who are treated with a lack of respect and kindness by our younger generation. I also try to pick things up that have fallen off the shelves in a store, and I stack the dishes and wipe my table off at a restaurant after I finish eating. I also try really hard to allow drivers around me, the opportunity to turn or merge infront of me, and I always stop to allow people to cross the road (as long as it is safe to do so). And I'm always willing to help people in need.
I also tend to notice good things that others do, and I appreciate them, even if it doesn't effect me personally. One day while at a liquer store, I was sitting in the car while Mark went inside. A man walked past me, bent over and picked up a big trashcan that had fallen over, before he went inside. It absolutely stunned me. I hadn't even noticed that the trashcan was laying on it's side, and even if I had, I'm not sure that I would have picked it up. He did such a tiny little act of goodness, and even if no one else noticed, I did and I felt an odd feeling of respect towards him. I also love when people go out of their way to hold the door open for someone else. It's such a small thing to do, but it can totally make an impression on someone's life.
Hmmm...a question worth pondering.
Long 3...(4?)... days
I haven't felt like posting the past few days because I wasn't feeling very well on Saterday night or Sunday. Pian finally went away, and my upper jaw has been hurting since. The pain is up by the root canal, and is causing a slight headache. Need to go to the dentist again, to see what's going on. I guess I just feel like I'm beginning to fall apart...and I'm only 27!!! I'm starting to find white (not gray) hairs occasionally, and figure that the stress is trying to take it's toll. It's funny, I'll be fine for years, then all of a sudden something happens, and then everything happens. Why can't I just get something like once a year?
On a sadder note, my brother had to take Wicket to the vet's this morning. He stopped using the bathroom and hasn't been all that interested in food lately. So they are going to try the insulin treatment, as soon as they can get him to start eating again. I just pray that everything goes good, because Wicket is his pride and joy. I truly feel like his aunt, because he has been apart of this family for the past 8 years. I don't know what any of us would do without him. So please say a little prayer that things go good with him and that he'll be home before we know it. Here's the guy we love so much....
On a sadder note, my brother had to take Wicket to the vet's this morning. He stopped using the bathroom and hasn't been all that interested in food lately. So they are going to try the insulin treatment, as soon as they can get him to start eating again. I just pray that everything goes good, because Wicket is his pride and joy. I truly feel like his aunt, because he has been apart of this family for the past 8 years. I don't know what any of us would do without him. So please say a little prayer that things go good with him and that he'll be home before we know it. Here's the guy we love so much....
Saturday, February 23, 2008
Friends are like balloons
Life is too short to wake up with regrets.
So love the people who treat you right.
Forget about the ones who don't.
Believe everything happens for a reason.
If you get a second chance, grab it with both hands.
If it changes your life, let it.
Nobody said life would be easy.
Friends are like balloons; once you let them go, you might not get them back. Sometimes we get so busy with our own lives and problems that we may not even notice that we've let them fly away. Sometimes we are so caught up in who's right and who's wrong that we forget what's right and wrong. Sometimes we just don't realize what real friendship means until it is too late.
So today I'm gonna tie you all to my heart, so that I never lose you.
So love the people who treat you right.
Forget about the ones who don't.
Believe everything happens for a reason.
If you get a second chance, grab it with both hands.
If it changes your life, let it.
Nobody said life would be easy.
Friends are like balloons; once you let them go, you might not get them back. Sometimes we get so busy with our own lives and problems that we may not even notice that we've let them fly away. Sometimes we are so caught up in who's right and who's wrong that we forget what's right and wrong. Sometimes we just don't realize what real friendship means until it is too late.
So today I'm gonna tie you all to my heart, so that I never lose you.
Friday, February 22, 2008
Some pictures
These are some pictures that were taken with my camera.
Snake from Metal Gear Solid (Marcus' Jack-o-Lantern)
Mark's Jack-o-Lantern
An owl that decided to chill on my horse trailer one afternoon.
A jackrabbit that showed up under our truck one day.
Snake from Metal Gear Solid (Marcus' Jack-o-Lantern)
Mark's Jack-o-Lantern
An owl that decided to chill on my horse trailer one afternoon.
A jackrabbit that showed up under our truck one day.
It's the weekend!
I forgot to tell you all about my weekend last weekend. Mark and I spent the whole three days out with the horses. It was beautiful weather, and we had a wonderful time.
Saterday, we created a device so that the horses could pick at hay through out the day. These guys are pigs, and if I threw them a flake of hay, they'd have it eatten within 20 minutes. They mainly eat pellets and I wanted to reintroduce hay into their diet. So Mark came up with this idea.
Then Sunday, we let the horses out into the arena area and they got to stretch their legs and do a little bit of grazing.
Monday, we put up automatic feeders. Those things are expensive!!! We got two, and they were $400 apiece. Mark told me I should buy them, so that when I have my surgery, no one has to worry about being home during the day to feed them (as long as someone checks on them morning and night). They are awesome, but I haven't gotten to use them yet. I'd prefer to personally go out and feed them, but it's nice to know that they are there just incase something comes up. And now, we can go out of town and not worry about being home by a certain time. It's hard to get away, to go out of town.
Mr Smarty Pants learned that the food comes out of the pipe, and he ended up ripping off a cord on one of the feeders, so now I have to replace it. :( They're always getting into everything! It's amazing that they get such joy out of simple little things. Gotta love em.
I'm hoping the weather this weekend will be nice because I'd like to go out and spend some time with the horses again. But right now, we have rain clouds in the sky, and gusty winds. Hard to tell on a day to day basis.
Saterday, we created a device so that the horses could pick at hay through out the day. These guys are pigs, and if I threw them a flake of hay, they'd have it eatten within 20 minutes. They mainly eat pellets and I wanted to reintroduce hay into their diet. So Mark came up with this idea.
Then Sunday, we let the horses out into the arena area and they got to stretch their legs and do a little bit of grazing.
Monday, we put up automatic feeders. Those things are expensive!!! We got two, and they were $400 apiece. Mark told me I should buy them, so that when I have my surgery, no one has to worry about being home during the day to feed them (as long as someone checks on them morning and night). They are awesome, but I haven't gotten to use them yet. I'd prefer to personally go out and feed them, but it's nice to know that they are there just incase something comes up. And now, we can go out of town and not worry about being home by a certain time. It's hard to get away, to go out of town.
Mr Smarty Pants learned that the food comes out of the pipe, and he ended up ripping off a cord on one of the feeders, so now I have to replace it. :( They're always getting into everything! It's amazing that they get such joy out of simple little things. Gotta love em.
I'm hoping the weather this weekend will be nice because I'd like to go out and spend some time with the horses again. But right now, we have rain clouds in the sky, and gusty winds. Hard to tell on a day to day basis.
"Who am I?" by SMV
When I look into the mirror,
I don't know who I see.
Is that someone else,
Or is it really me?
That person tries to please others,
And live up to their expectations.
She gains her self confidence,
from their congratulations.
That girl tries her best,
just to be perfect.
Thats where she feels she gets her love,
so it makes it worth it.
Through her life,
She's learned to live with the pressure.
When she makes a mistake,
She always hears a lecture.
She lives for everyone else,
And that makes her sad.
She'd like to live for herself,
Without making everyone mad.
I realize now that girl is me,
Yet it is not.
I'm what others have created,
Not what I have sought.
I don't know who I see.
Is that someone else,
Or is it really me?
That person tries to please others,
And live up to their expectations.
She gains her self confidence,
from their congratulations.
That girl tries her best,
just to be perfect.
Thats where she feels she gets her love,
so it makes it worth it.
Through her life,
She's learned to live with the pressure.
When she makes a mistake,
She always hears a lecture.
She lives for everyone else,
And that makes her sad.
She'd like to live for herself,
Without making everyone mad.
I realize now that girl is me,
Yet it is not.
I'm what others have created,
Not what I have sought.
All I can say is....WOW!
When I was younger...much younger and in 9th grade to be exact...I wanted to venture out and photograph nature. To me, that would have been the ultimate career. To be able to go out and capture the most mesmerizing images, that people would marvel at for some time. But I guess things just don't turn out the way you want them to....dreams disappear and reality appears.
I saw this posted on the forum today, and I actually have some of these pictures hanging up on my bedroom wall. I was in aww, to see such beautiful photos.
http://www.robertvavra.com/index.html
Such a gift of talent!
I saw this posted on the forum today, and I actually have some of these pictures hanging up on my bedroom wall. I was in aww, to see such beautiful photos.
http://www.robertvavra.com/index.html
Such a gift of talent!
Ah jealousy...a splendid thing!
Luis (our farrier) came out to trim the horses hooves yesterday. Let me just say that Luis is a really nice guy, and cute in a "married with kids" kinda way. I've known him for about a year and a half now, hard to beleive that time flies by so quickly. But it's always ackward when he comes out to trim them. If Mark is there, then Luis hardly talks to me, and I feel like I get Mark's evil eye whenever I ask Luis questions. But if Mark isn't there, then Luis asks me questions and it seems a lot less stressful for everyone. Not that I blame Mark, Luis and I both share a love of horses, and that's something he just doesn't understand...although he loves "our two horses".
It hasn't really been too bad, Mark seldom makes comments about it, but you can just feel the tension whenever Luis is around. Yesterday ended up throwing us for a loop though. Luis works as a trainer at a local Thoroughbred racing ranch and farriers in his freetime. They have about 40 horses there in training. Well out of nowhere, Luis tells us that we should come out and visit the ranch. I asked him if they get a lot of visitors and he said mainly on the weekend. That's when Luis doesn't have to work. I saw Mark inhale, then he said calmly "Maybe we'll do that one of these days". That means that he was just being polite, and has no intention of going for a visit! I on the other hand, would love to go out and be surrounded by all the horses. I guess I'll just have to give it a week, and then ask Mark if he wants to go. :D
I actually think it's cute when Mark is jealous. I spent the first few years of our relationship, being the jealous eyed monster. He has seldom showed jealousy, but when he does, I think it proves to me that he does love me. :)
It hasn't really been too bad, Mark seldom makes comments about it, but you can just feel the tension whenever Luis is around. Yesterday ended up throwing us for a loop though. Luis works as a trainer at a local Thoroughbred racing ranch and farriers in his freetime. They have about 40 horses there in training. Well out of nowhere, Luis tells us that we should come out and visit the ranch. I asked him if they get a lot of visitors and he said mainly on the weekend. That's when Luis doesn't have to work. I saw Mark inhale, then he said calmly "Maybe we'll do that one of these days". That means that he was just being polite, and has no intention of going for a visit! I on the other hand, would love to go out and be surrounded by all the horses. I guess I'll just have to give it a week, and then ask Mark if he wants to go. :D
I actually think it's cute when Mark is jealous. I spent the first few years of our relationship, being the jealous eyed monster. He has seldom showed jealousy, but when he does, I think it proves to me that he does love me. :)
Thursday, February 21, 2008
It's times like these.....
Where I truly wish that America was like ANY other country in the world!!! Let me just start off by saying...America's judicial system SUCKS!!! There is NO justice in our system.
I know a woman who lost her 18 year old son in June of 2006. Let me just say....Marty is a valued member of our Mini forum, and she has always shared her boys with us. Michael and Dan are her pride and joy. Anyways, in June we were all saddened to read that Michael was riding a mo-ped type motorbike when he was struck by another young man who was driving reckless. The man fled the scene, and was later found. He had two prior accidents THAT DAY, was intoxicated and had drugs in his system. He also ran a meth lab, had a past history of violence, a long line of felonies, and had shot his own father in the head.
We've lived with her...each time this man has been arrested and let loose, first holidays without Michael there with the family, and those special moments and memories that he left behind. Her family has waited a year and a half for their day in court, which will be next Tuesday. Today, she had to go to a meeting with the DA and she was told that this guy will do a maximum of 3-5 years in jail, and that's if the jury doesn't end up feeling sorry for him and letting him go scott-free. She was told that there may be a plea bargain for 6 years, if they don't end up taking it to trial. But if it does go to trial, the judge has ruled against them being able to show any pictures of Michael, or telling about what kind of boy he was...because that would prejudice the jury. Therefore, Michael's family cannot address the court or jury AT ALL. The jury will also not be told about the murderer's prior convictions, or the fact that he was intoxicated/drugged when the accident occured (he fled the scene...therefore, even though there were witnesses and he later tested positive, they can't prove he was at the exact minute of the crime). The jury will ONLY know that the murderer was driving wreckless when he struck Michael, and that he fled the scene.
What I don't understand is...this is court! It should be the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. It shouldn't be biased (to how it will affect the murderer and his life)...it should be based on how EVERYONE has been/will be affected. Unfortunately, Michael can't be there to speak about how it affected him...only his family is left to do that, and they aren't even being allowed the opportunity. It makes me sick! And people wonder why so many people take justice into their own hands.
Any other country treats their criminals, as just that! Only in America are criminals considered more sacred than the victim. Want to stop paying taxes/child support, get paid decent wages, and get food and housing for free? Do a crime in America! I swear to you, prison is not that bad. I had a family member who could not cope in society because he had been in prison so long. He would do crimes, just so he could go back. He had it made in there and didn't have to take responsibility for himself. It happens WAAAAY too often!
I know a woman who lost her 18 year old son in June of 2006. Let me just say....Marty is a valued member of our Mini forum, and she has always shared her boys with us. Michael and Dan are her pride and joy. Anyways, in June we were all saddened to read that Michael was riding a mo-ped type motorbike when he was struck by another young man who was driving reckless. The man fled the scene, and was later found. He had two prior accidents THAT DAY, was intoxicated and had drugs in his system. He also ran a meth lab, had a past history of violence, a long line of felonies, and had shot his own father in the head.
We've lived with her...each time this man has been arrested and let loose, first holidays without Michael there with the family, and those special moments and memories that he left behind. Her family has waited a year and a half for their day in court, which will be next Tuesday. Today, she had to go to a meeting with the DA and she was told that this guy will do a maximum of 3-5 years in jail, and that's if the jury doesn't end up feeling sorry for him and letting him go scott-free. She was told that there may be a plea bargain for 6 years, if they don't end up taking it to trial. But if it does go to trial, the judge has ruled against them being able to show any pictures of Michael, or telling about what kind of boy he was...because that would prejudice the jury. Therefore, Michael's family cannot address the court or jury AT ALL. The jury will also not be told about the murderer's prior convictions, or the fact that he was intoxicated/drugged when the accident occured (he fled the scene...therefore, even though there were witnesses and he later tested positive, they can't prove he was at the exact minute of the crime). The jury will ONLY know that the murderer was driving wreckless when he struck Michael, and that he fled the scene.
What I don't understand is...this is court! It should be the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. It shouldn't be biased (to how it will affect the murderer and his life)...it should be based on how EVERYONE has been/will be affected. Unfortunately, Michael can't be there to speak about how it affected him...only his family is left to do that, and they aren't even being allowed the opportunity. It makes me sick! And people wonder why so many people take justice into their own hands.
Any other country treats their criminals, as just that! Only in America are criminals considered more sacred than the victim. Want to stop paying taxes/child support, get paid decent wages, and get food and housing for free? Do a crime in America! I swear to you, prison is not that bad. I had a family member who could not cope in society because he had been in prison so long. He would do crimes, just so he could go back. He had it made in there and didn't have to take responsibility for himself. It happens WAAAAY too often!
Who saw it???
Last night we had an eclipse. I used to think they were rare...but apparently it's just the type that's rare? This is the second night eclipse I have seen since the end of August. But I got better pictures of the one last night, than the one before. :)
The way the moon shadowed over, then revealed itself was weird. But very interesting.
I don't know what's up with either this blog or photobucket, but my pictures never seem to come out right. At first, they were all supposed to be small, then some refused, so I had to try to make them all big. As you can see, it didn't work either, so I had to go half and half. :( Oh well, BUT I love that camera! We spent about $800 for it, and it has been worth every penny. It has a wonderful zoom. Maybe I'll post some nature shots we've taken with it, when I have some time.
The way the moon shadowed over, then revealed itself was weird. But very interesting.
I don't know what's up with either this blog or photobucket, but my pictures never seem to come out right. At first, they were all supposed to be small, then some refused, so I had to try to make them all big. As you can see, it didn't work either, so I had to go half and half. :( Oh well, BUT I love that camera! We spent about $800 for it, and it has been worth every penny. It has a wonderful zoom. Maybe I'll post some nature shots we've taken with it, when I have some time.
"Rain" by SMV
My heart is a cloud,
The dark color of Gray.
In a time of pain,
words are hard to say.
My heart sings like thunder,
so loud and sad.
My memories of you,
Are all that I had.
My heart pours,
in a heavy rain.
My days with you are gone,
And now I feel the pain.
You were my rainbow,
what am I supposed to do?
My life was lived for us,
Only me and you.
The dark color of Gray.
In a time of pain,
words are hard to say.
My heart sings like thunder,
so loud and sad.
My memories of you,
Are all that I had.
My heart pours,
in a heavy rain.
My days with you are gone,
And now I feel the pain.
You were my rainbow,
what am I supposed to do?
My life was lived for us,
Only me and you.
Saying goodbye
As some of you know, I've been fostering a little kitty since the middle of November. He's been doing pretty good, but the fact that he's been living in our bathroom, has been a problem. So, Mark and I decided to take him to an adoption shelter. It was HARD! I have never in my life given away an animal, except to family.
I don't believe in euthanizing animals, so I had to make sure that the woman wouldn't be out to destroy the little guy. She assured me that she has only put 4 animals to sleep, since she has been in business and they were due to cancer. I truly felt comfortable that she would try her hardest to make sure that he gets a good home. She said that he needs to be a housecat. Binx hated the little guy, so besides spending his life in our bathroom, that wasn't possible with us. I just feel so sad and scared for him. I want the best for him, and I feel like I made the right choice. If not, he would have been right back outside when the weather turned good, and that wasn't right to do to him after all he's been through.
She told me that in her experience, it sounds like he was bitten either by a spider or a scorpion, and that the venom could have stunted his growth and caused the neurological problems. I just wish that I could have given him to a family member or friend, so that I could have known how he was doing through out his life. Thats the worst part for me.
Anyways, I took his blankets, heating pad, food dish, and supply of moist kitty food, so that he would have them with him. The spoiled little guy! It was really hard to walk away though. How people do this all the time beats me...or people who breed and raise animals...it's heart breaking! She asked me if I plan to breed my mare, and I told her "no way". There are so many unwanted animals in this world, I hope to never be the reason another animal is brought into it!!! It's so unfair to the animals that keep coming, and eventually end up unwanted or being destroyed.
I hate the fact that people pop puppies, kittens and foals (horses) out constantly! If you need money...get a job!!! And people who claim that they are in it for the love of the animal...what the fuck ever! If you loved that animal, you would never be able to bring yourself to sell it to someone else....let alone breed more, just to give away. And those who want to better the breed? HA! What good is it to better the breed, if that better animal ends up going to the humane society, to an unloving home, or running the streets one day. Just because YOU pick out a good home for that animal, doesn't mean that it is a lifetime home. Things come up, people are forced to get rid of animals...why would anyone who loves animals want to chance that for something they brought into the world??? There is NO excuse to keep breeding, until numbers of animals already here, begin to dwindle quite a bit.
If you're not part of the solution, then you're part of the problem and unfortunately, it's the animals whose voices can't be heard, who suffer the consequences.
Here's to hopes for a bright, loving future for the Little Guy (in all his dirty glory)......
I don't believe in euthanizing animals, so I had to make sure that the woman wouldn't be out to destroy the little guy. She assured me that she has only put 4 animals to sleep, since she has been in business and they were due to cancer. I truly felt comfortable that she would try her hardest to make sure that he gets a good home. She said that he needs to be a housecat. Binx hated the little guy, so besides spending his life in our bathroom, that wasn't possible with us. I just feel so sad and scared for him. I want the best for him, and I feel like I made the right choice. If not, he would have been right back outside when the weather turned good, and that wasn't right to do to him after all he's been through.
She told me that in her experience, it sounds like he was bitten either by a spider or a scorpion, and that the venom could have stunted his growth and caused the neurological problems. I just wish that I could have given him to a family member or friend, so that I could have known how he was doing through out his life. Thats the worst part for me.
Anyways, I took his blankets, heating pad, food dish, and supply of moist kitty food, so that he would have them with him. The spoiled little guy! It was really hard to walk away though. How people do this all the time beats me...or people who breed and raise animals...it's heart breaking! She asked me if I plan to breed my mare, and I told her "no way". There are so many unwanted animals in this world, I hope to never be the reason another animal is brought into it!!! It's so unfair to the animals that keep coming, and eventually end up unwanted or being destroyed.
I hate the fact that people pop puppies, kittens and foals (horses) out constantly! If you need money...get a job!!! And people who claim that they are in it for the love of the animal...what the fuck ever! If you loved that animal, you would never be able to bring yourself to sell it to someone else....let alone breed more, just to give away. And those who want to better the breed? HA! What good is it to better the breed, if that better animal ends up going to the humane society, to an unloving home, or running the streets one day. Just because YOU pick out a good home for that animal, doesn't mean that it is a lifetime home. Things come up, people are forced to get rid of animals...why would anyone who loves animals want to chance that for something they brought into the world??? There is NO excuse to keep breeding, until numbers of animals already here, begin to dwindle quite a bit.
If you're not part of the solution, then you're part of the problem and unfortunately, it's the animals whose voices can't be heard, who suffer the consequences.
Here's to hopes for a bright, loving future for the Little Guy (in all his dirty glory)......
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Technology...everything it's cracked up to be?
I realized yesterday that technology runs our lives. We would be in a state of emergency, if the things we take for granted daily, were to stop running. For those of you who have seen "Live Free or Die Hard", you got a pretty good look at what could happen, should someone tap into the big "computer".
Yesterday, while I was online, I got kicked off. Didn't think too much about it until I realized that my cell phone didn't have any reception. Then, tried calling Mark on the landline, and we had no long distance either. Hours pass, and then my brother calls from work, saying that their interent and long distance were down also. They couldn't take people's credit cards or checks, because they couldn't get through to the company/bank. He was also told by a customer, that ATM's were down. No 1-800 numbers were working or anything, so I couldn't contact my local bank to find out if this was true or not. Sure enough, my mom called her bank, and they told her that they weren't allowing anyone to withdraw more than $100 (inside the bank) because their system was down too. Apparently, some guy knocked down a computer line in Fort Irwin by mistake, and it created all this mess.
This only happened for a few hours in my town. Could you imagine if it was done to knock out the country's computer system? We would be in a quick state of chaos. And understandably too. We rely far too much on technology. Just not having reception on my cell phone was driving me insane. I had no way to reach Mark, because even though the landline was working for local calls, Mark works 45 minutes away and couldn't be reached via cell or long distance. It sucked. I believe there were a lot of angry customers yesterday as well...they couldn't use their credit cards, checks or pull money out of the bank. They were virtually stuck! What would happen if banks started freezing accounts because something went wrong. It would be 9/11 all over again, but much more dramatic.
It's a scary thought!
Yesterday, while I was online, I got kicked off. Didn't think too much about it until I realized that my cell phone didn't have any reception. Then, tried calling Mark on the landline, and we had no long distance either. Hours pass, and then my brother calls from work, saying that their interent and long distance were down also. They couldn't take people's credit cards or checks, because they couldn't get through to the company/bank. He was also told by a customer, that ATM's were down. No 1-800 numbers were working or anything, so I couldn't contact my local bank to find out if this was true or not. Sure enough, my mom called her bank, and they told her that they weren't allowing anyone to withdraw more than $100 (inside the bank) because their system was down too. Apparently, some guy knocked down a computer line in Fort Irwin by mistake, and it created all this mess.
This only happened for a few hours in my town. Could you imagine if it was done to knock out the country's computer system? We would be in a quick state of chaos. And understandably too. We rely far too much on technology. Just not having reception on my cell phone was driving me insane. I had no way to reach Mark, because even though the landline was working for local calls, Mark works 45 minutes away and couldn't be reached via cell or long distance. It sucked. I believe there were a lot of angry customers yesterday as well...they couldn't use their credit cards, checks or pull money out of the bank. They were virtually stuck! What would happen if banks started freezing accounts because something went wrong. It would be 9/11 all over again, but much more dramatic.
It's a scary thought!
Woot Woot!
Just found out that Bridget got herself a trusty Blog too. YAY! Now we can gossip even more than we do. World...watch out!!!
Lost Feelings
When I was a teenager, I wrote poetry as a way of expressing myself. I had a hard time telling others how I felt, and when I wrote, it was like my heart was lifting from the weight that had been placed on the paper. My poems meant everything to me, because they were what made me...me. I had two small books, which contained 203 finished poems, and ideas for lots of other ones. During our last move, I misplaced these two books, and I have spent the past 6 years trying to find them. I have flipped my house upside down, and searched my shed from top to bottom, just to come up empty handed. I called my mom last night nearly crying because I wanted to find these books before I go in for surgery. I've already searched through her closet too, and we were going to start in her shed this weekend.
Don't ask me what it was, but something inside ended up telling me to check Mark's closet again (it's a small closet). There are only 3 boxes in there, and Mark and I have both searched in there at least twice over the years. Well the first box I bent into, had my books right there on top. It was the wierdest thing, and Mark couldn't even understand how they were there and never seen. So now, I have my books. I spent an hour reading through my lost poems, and I have to say that while I was only 16/17 when I wrote these, I did a good job at displaying my heart. It brought back a lot of my old feelings, some good, some bad, and put me right back where I was when I wrote them so long ago.
I've decided that I may start sharing some of them on my blog. Those were my darkest years, where I felt the most lost. But they were also the years that made me realize the kind of person I was going to become. I think I was actually more intuned to others around me back then, and things impacted me more strongly. I was able to hear a story, and visualize myself in it, and how I would feel. I learned through those years that life is not black and white, but full of gray shadowing and maybe even some rainbow colors if you could find them. I'm sure that you will all understand that some of the poems are too personal to share, but I promise to look for those that should still keep you reading. :) Who knows, maybe in time, I'll start writing again...but for now, this blog offers me a way to express myself, and as long as it comes out somehow, then I'm perfectly content. :)
So stay tuned...
Don't ask me what it was, but something inside ended up telling me to check Mark's closet again (it's a small closet). There are only 3 boxes in there, and Mark and I have both searched in there at least twice over the years. Well the first box I bent into, had my books right there on top. It was the wierdest thing, and Mark couldn't even understand how they were there and never seen. So now, I have my books. I spent an hour reading through my lost poems, and I have to say that while I was only 16/17 when I wrote these, I did a good job at displaying my heart. It brought back a lot of my old feelings, some good, some bad, and put me right back where I was when I wrote them so long ago.
I've decided that I may start sharing some of them on my blog. Those were my darkest years, where I felt the most lost. But they were also the years that made me realize the kind of person I was going to become. I think I was actually more intuned to others around me back then, and things impacted me more strongly. I was able to hear a story, and visualize myself in it, and how I would feel. I learned through those years that life is not black and white, but full of gray shadowing and maybe even some rainbow colors if you could find them. I'm sure that you will all understand that some of the poems are too personal to share, but I promise to look for those that should still keep you reading. :) Who knows, maybe in time, I'll start writing again...but for now, this blog offers me a way to express myself, and as long as it comes out somehow, then I'm perfectly content. :)
So stay tuned...
Three wishes
If you found a magic genie or a leprechan, what would your three wishes be?
My first wish would be.....that me, and all of my family, friends and pets, live an extremely long, healthy and happy life.
My second wish would be.....that I gradually lose weight and tone up, until my body looks identical to Angelina Jolie's in "The Bone Collector". :P
And my third wish would be.....that I would strike it BIG in Vegas on my next trip. ;)
My first wish would be.....that me, and all of my family, friends and pets, live an extremely long, healthy and happy life.
My second wish would be.....that I gradually lose weight and tone up, until my body looks identical to Angelina Jolie's in "The Bone Collector". :P
And my third wish would be.....that I would strike it BIG in Vegas on my next trip. ;)
The Art of a Good Marriage
Wilferd Arlan Peterson wrote this:
Happiness in marriage is not something that just happens.
A good marriage must be created.
In marriage the little things are the big things.
It is never being too old to hold hands.
It is remembering to say "I love you" at least once a day.
It is never going to sleep angry.
It is at no time taking the other for granted; the courtship should not endwith the honeymoon, it should continue through the years.
It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives.
It is standing together facing the world.
It is forming a circle of love that gathers the whole family.
It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice,but in the spirit of joy.
It is speaking words of appreciationand demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.
It is not looking for perfection in each other.
It is cultivating flexibility, patience,understanding and a sense of humour.
It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.
It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow old.
It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.
It is establishing a relationship in which the independence is equal, dependence is mutual and the obligation is reciprocal.
It is not only marrying the right partner, it is being the right partner.
"Recipe for Love"
2 cups of friendship
2 cups of joy
2 heaping cups of kindness
2 minds full of tenderness
2 hearts full of love
2 big hearts of forgiveness
4 armfulls of gentleness
1 lifetime of togetherness
Stir daily with happiness, humor and patience. Serve with warmth, compassion, respect and loyalty.
Happiness in marriage is not something that just happens.
A good marriage must be created.
In marriage the little things are the big things.
It is never being too old to hold hands.
It is remembering to say "I love you" at least once a day.
It is never going to sleep angry.
It is at no time taking the other for granted; the courtship should not endwith the honeymoon, it should continue through the years.
It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives.
It is standing together facing the world.
It is forming a circle of love that gathers the whole family.
It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice,but in the spirit of joy.
It is speaking words of appreciationand demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.
It is not looking for perfection in each other.
It is cultivating flexibility, patience,understanding and a sense of humour.
It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.
It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow old.
It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.
It is establishing a relationship in which the independence is equal, dependence is mutual and the obligation is reciprocal.
It is not only marrying the right partner, it is being the right partner.
"Recipe for Love"
2 cups of friendship
2 cups of joy
2 heaping cups of kindness
2 minds full of tenderness
2 hearts full of love
2 big hearts of forgiveness
4 armfulls of gentleness
1 lifetime of togetherness
Stir daily with happiness, humor and patience. Serve with warmth, compassion, respect and loyalty.
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
And then it is winter....
You know, time has a way of moving quickly and catching you unaware of the passing years. It seems just yesterday that I was young, just married and embarking on my new life with my mate. And yet in a way, it seems like eons ago, and I wonder where all the years went. I know that I lived them all...
And I have glimpses of how it was back then and of all my hopes and dreams... But, here it is...the winter of my life and it catches me by surprise... How did I get here so fast? Where did the years go and where did my babies go? And where did my youth go? I remember well.. seeing older people through the years and thinking that those older people were years away from me and that winter was so far off that I could not fathom it or imagine fully what it would be like... But, here it is...my friends are retired and getting gray...they move slower and I see an older person now. Lots are in better shape than me... but, I see the great change... Not like the ones that I remember who were young and vibrant... but, like me, their age is beginning to show and we are now those older folks that we used to see and never thought we'd be.
Each day now, I find that sometimes getting a shower is a real target for the day! And taking a nap is not a treat anymore...it's mandatory! Cause if I don't on my own free will, I just fall asleep where I sit! And so, now I enter into this new season of my life unprepared for all the aches and pains and the loss of strength and ability to go and do things that I wish I had done but never did!! But, at least I know, that though the winter has come, and I'm not sure how long it will last...this I know, that when it's over...its over....
Yes , I have regrets. There are things I wish I hadn't done, things I should have done, but indeed, there are many things I'm happy to have done and would do again without regret. It's all in a lifetime....So, if you're not in your winter yet...let me remind you, that it will be here faster than you think. So, whatever you would like to accomplish in your life please do it quickly! Don't put things off too long!! Life goes by quickly. So, do what you can today, as you can never be sure whether this is your winter or not! You have no promise that you will see all the seasons of your life...so, live for good today and say all the things that you want your loved ones to remember...and hope that they appreciate and love you for all the things that you have done for them in all the years past!!
'Life is a gift to you. The way you live your life is your gift to those who come after.
Make it a fantastic one.'
LIVE IT WELL!!----ENJOY TODAY!!!!-----DO SOMETHING FUN!!!----BE HAPPY!!!----BE THANKFUL!!!!!
And I have glimpses of how it was back then and of all my hopes and dreams... But, here it is...the winter of my life and it catches me by surprise... How did I get here so fast? Where did the years go and where did my babies go? And where did my youth go? I remember well.. seeing older people through the years and thinking that those older people were years away from me and that winter was so far off that I could not fathom it or imagine fully what it would be like... But, here it is...my friends are retired and getting gray...they move slower and I see an older person now. Lots are in better shape than me... but, I see the great change... Not like the ones that I remember who were young and vibrant... but, like me, their age is beginning to show and we are now those older folks that we used to see and never thought we'd be.
Each day now, I find that sometimes getting a shower is a real target for the day! And taking a nap is not a treat anymore...it's mandatory! Cause if I don't on my own free will, I just fall asleep where I sit! And so, now I enter into this new season of my life unprepared for all the aches and pains and the loss of strength and ability to go and do things that I wish I had done but never did!! But, at least I know, that though the winter has come, and I'm not sure how long it will last...this I know, that when it's over...its over....
Yes , I have regrets. There are things I wish I hadn't done, things I should have done, but indeed, there are many things I'm happy to have done and would do again without regret. It's all in a lifetime....So, if you're not in your winter yet...let me remind you, that it will be here faster than you think. So, whatever you would like to accomplish in your life please do it quickly! Don't put things off too long!! Life goes by quickly. So, do what you can today, as you can never be sure whether this is your winter or not! You have no promise that you will see all the seasons of your life...so, live for good today and say all the things that you want your loved ones to remember...and hope that they appreciate and love you for all the things that you have done for them in all the years past!!
'Life is a gift to you. The way you live your life is your gift to those who come after.
Make it a fantastic one.'
LIVE IT WELL!!----ENJOY TODAY!!!!-----DO SOMETHING FUN!!!----BE HAPPY!!!----BE THANKFUL!!!!!
I've been tagged!
I've been tagged by Michelle. Now I have to share 7 things that you may not know about me. I've thought long and hard, and I've come to realize that most people know ALOT about me. Lol.
1. I cuss more than anyone I've ever known, BUT I never cuss in public. I feel it's extremely disrespectful, and I won't subject others to it. I even get upset when I hear others cuss in a store.
2. I'm somewhat dyslexic. I have a really hard time when I try to remember the next letter after a certain alphebet. When I was little, I could say my alphabets backwards faster than I could frontwards. To this day, I can do them backwards without any thought whatsoever. So when I try to think of what comes after...say the letter "R"...I always want to say "Q" instead of "S".
3. I'm a HUGE reader. I've read 35 books since the middle of November (today's February 19th). I'm currently on my 36th, which I hope to have finished today.
4. I've always been jealous of men. They always seem to have good friendships with each other and they don't take things personal. If something happens today, it's forgotten tomorrow.
5. My hero is Tyler Perry. He is an awesome man, and I think he is the most insperational person, besides Darren Hayes.
6. I feel better hanging out with elderly people, than people my own age. I always have.
7. Two years ago, I was going through a hard time and I was talking to Mark about committing myself. Sure glad things worked out. :)
Ok, now I tag Rene. :P
1. I cuss more than anyone I've ever known, BUT I never cuss in public. I feel it's extremely disrespectful, and I won't subject others to it. I even get upset when I hear others cuss in a store.
2. I'm somewhat dyslexic. I have a really hard time when I try to remember the next letter after a certain alphebet. When I was little, I could say my alphabets backwards faster than I could frontwards. To this day, I can do them backwards without any thought whatsoever. So when I try to think of what comes after...say the letter "R"...I always want to say "Q" instead of "S".
3. I'm a HUGE reader. I've read 35 books since the middle of November (today's February 19th). I'm currently on my 36th, which I hope to have finished today.
4. I've always been jealous of men. They always seem to have good friendships with each other and they don't take things personal. If something happens today, it's forgotten tomorrow.
5. My hero is Tyler Perry. He is an awesome man, and I think he is the most insperational person, besides Darren Hayes.
6. I feel better hanging out with elderly people, than people my own age. I always have.
7. Two years ago, I was going through a hard time and I was talking to Mark about committing myself. Sure glad things worked out. :)
Ok, now I tag Rene. :P
Monday, February 18, 2008
Cure for a woman's low self esteem
It's called make-up and a hair brush!!! I had the unpleasant experience of being caught in my natural state the other morning.
Here's what happened...I had to take my brother to work at 8 in the morning. So I got up at 7, and by the time I got dressed and fed the horses, I barely had time to brush my hair. We left here at 7:45 and he got there a little early. No one is allowed to enter the stores until after 8, or security calls the police. So...we had to sit there until 8:05, to make sure that we bypassed 8. Not two minutes before I was going to leave, here comes security pulling up behind my car. I told Marcus to "get out of the car now". By the time he did, the guy was already approaching my car window. As soon as he saw Marcus, he said "Oh it's you, I didn't know who it was". But it was too late! He had already seen me at my worst.
Yep, that was embarrassing! I literally looked like I just woke up. I always feel so self contious when I don't have my makeup on. It's amazing how much better something so simple can make you feel. I once saw this little video about this woman who started out as plain as plain could be. By the time she applied makeup and did her hair, you could hardly tell it was the same woman. So in honor of that woman's bravery, I will show you guys the difference of my before and after, and let you guys see what I'm talking about.
There it is people...mark this day on the calendar, or save this post to your computer because it won't happen again.
Here's what happened...I had to take my brother to work at 8 in the morning. So I got up at 7, and by the time I got dressed and fed the horses, I barely had time to brush my hair. We left here at 7:45 and he got there a little early. No one is allowed to enter the stores until after 8, or security calls the police. So...we had to sit there until 8:05, to make sure that we bypassed 8. Not two minutes before I was going to leave, here comes security pulling up behind my car. I told Marcus to "get out of the car now". By the time he did, the guy was already approaching my car window. As soon as he saw Marcus, he said "Oh it's you, I didn't know who it was". But it was too late! He had already seen me at my worst.
Yep, that was embarrassing! I literally looked like I just woke up. I always feel so self contious when I don't have my makeup on. It's amazing how much better something so simple can make you feel. I once saw this little video about this woman who started out as plain as plain could be. By the time she applied makeup and did her hair, you could hardly tell it was the same woman. So in honor of that woman's bravery, I will show you guys the difference of my before and after, and let you guys see what I'm talking about.
There it is people...mark this day on the calendar, or save this post to your computer because it won't happen again.
Words to live by
Sometimes the road of life may seem a bit bumpy, but it's just a small part of the great journey your on.
Anger is a condition in which The tongue works faster than the mind .
You can't change the past, but you can ruin the present by worrying over the future!
Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood.
Love...and you shall be loved.
If you don't like something, change it. If you can not change it, change the way you think about it.
All people smile in the same language.
Everyone needs to be loved... especially when they do not deserve it.
The real measure of a person's wealth is what he has invested in eternity.
To plant a garden, is to believe in tomorrow.
Everyone has beauty but not everyone sees it.
People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges.
It's important for parents to live the same things they teach.
If you fill your heart with regrets of yesterday and the worries of tomorrow, you have no today to be thankful for.
The choice you make today will usually affect tomorrow.
Sometimes the littlest things in life, can make your whole world change.
Take time to laugh, for it is the music of the soul.
Patience is the ability to idle your motor when you feel like stripping your gears.
Love is strengthened by working through conflicts together!
Harsh words break no bones but they do break hearts.
To get out of a difficulty, one usually must go through it.
We take for granted the things that we should be giving thanks for.
Love is the only thing that can be divided without being diminished.
The most beautiful things in the world, must be seen from the heart.
Believe in Life, Love and Yourself.
Happiness is enhanced by others but does not depend upon others.
Cast the gift of a lovely thought into the heart of a friend.
For every minute you are angry with someone, you lose 60 seconds of happiness that you can never get back.
Do what you can, for who you can, with what you have, and where you are.
Anger is a condition in which The tongue works faster than the mind .
You can't change the past, but you can ruin the present by worrying over the future!
Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood.
Love...and you shall be loved.
If you don't like something, change it. If you can not change it, change the way you think about it.
All people smile in the same language.
Everyone needs to be loved... especially when they do not deserve it.
The real measure of a person's wealth is what he has invested in eternity.
To plant a garden, is to believe in tomorrow.
Everyone has beauty but not everyone sees it.
People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges.
It's important for parents to live the same things they teach.
If you fill your heart with regrets of yesterday and the worries of tomorrow, you have no today to be thankful for.
The choice you make today will usually affect tomorrow.
Sometimes the littlest things in life, can make your whole world change.
Take time to laugh, for it is the music of the soul.
Patience is the ability to idle your motor when you feel like stripping your gears.
Love is strengthened by working through conflicts together!
Harsh words break no bones but they do break hearts.
To get out of a difficulty, one usually must go through it.
We take for granted the things that we should be giving thanks for.
Love is the only thing that can be divided without being diminished.
The most beautiful things in the world, must be seen from the heart.
Believe in Life, Love and Yourself.
Happiness is enhanced by others but does not depend upon others.
Cast the gift of a lovely thought into the heart of a friend.
For every minute you are angry with someone, you lose 60 seconds of happiness that you can never get back.
Do what you can, for who you can, with what you have, and where you are.
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Could this be right? :)
I saw a description for "Virgo". I think this might have some truth to it...what do you think?
VIRGO - "The Perfectionist"
Dominant in relationships...Yes! This is me!!! I keep trying to remind myself that Mark is supposed to wear the pants in the family. Damn...after nearly 9 years, he hasn't trained me all that well. :P
Conservative...Possibly. While I do believe that change is good and often times required...I believe the ways of the old, might have been better for the most part.
Always wants the last word...Bingo!!! Why can't people (especially Mark) realize that I'm always right!?! I know, I know...people only learn from their mistakes, but geeze, how many times do ya gotta learn??? :D
Argumentative...Nope, auh auh, not me!!!.............Alright already!!! I admit it. If I think that I am right, I will argue until my face turns blue.
Worries...Fits me to a T. I try and try, to follow my Gigi's way of life. She doesn't worry about ANYTHING! But try as I might, I still fall short. I'm a big ol' worry wart!
Very smart...I didn't get offered a scholarship for nothing! I believe this one goes hand in hand with "always wants to have the last word" and "argumentative". See! There's a reason why I'm those things! It's because I'm a smarty pants! I have "straight A" report cards to prove it!
Dislikes noise and chaos...Well I have no idea where this one came from. I love noise and chaos! If my car is too quiet, I bump my music. I also love going out to the local club and enjoying the music, or to the movies, to be up close and personal with the effects.
Eager...Hmmm...am I eager? I guess if I know something special is coming my way. Other than that, I like to take one day at a time.
Hardworking...Yes, yes, yes...this is one of my downfalls. I always go to work (unless I am positively not capable) and do my job! I didn't get perfect attentance in school for 6 years straight for nothing. I do my best at everything I try. If only, I could keep some of that "Hardworking" at home and do all the things that need to be done. :(
Loyal...One of my better qualities. I try really hard to be there for those I care about, and I would do anything in my power to help someone in need. I can keep secrets with the best of them, and I defend my own.
Beautiful...You know...I'm short and fat...yet I still get hit on by guys. That must be saying alot about my face.
Easy to talk to...Too much so. I hear way too many things that I don't wanna hear.
Hard to please...Not so! I am very easily pleased! Unless it's in a relationship, then yes, I am hard to please. I expect a lot out of someone who I share my life with.
Harsh...I've been told that I can be, although I don't purposely set out to be so.
Practical and very fussy...I like things done a certain way. Is that so wrong???
Pessimistic...Well............I have spent a good part of my life being so. But I really try hard to see the glass half full now days. Well, I take that back! What's up with that metaphor anyways? It has a very easy answer...if you fill an empty glass only half way, then it's half full. If it was full to begin with, and you drink half of it, it's half empty. Does seeing it as half empty, really make you a pessimist?
VIRGO - "The Perfectionist"
Dominant in relationships...Yes! This is me!!! I keep trying to remind myself that Mark is supposed to wear the pants in the family. Damn...after nearly 9 years, he hasn't trained me all that well. :P
Conservative...Possibly. While I do believe that change is good and often times required...I believe the ways of the old, might have been better for the most part.
Always wants the last word...Bingo!!! Why can't people (especially Mark) realize that I'm always right!?! I know, I know...people only learn from their mistakes, but geeze, how many times do ya gotta learn??? :D
Argumentative...Nope, auh auh, not me!!!.............Alright already!!! I admit it. If I think that I am right, I will argue until my face turns blue.
Worries...Fits me to a T. I try and try, to follow my Gigi's way of life. She doesn't worry about ANYTHING! But try as I might, I still fall short. I'm a big ol' worry wart!
Very smart...I didn't get offered a scholarship for nothing! I believe this one goes hand in hand with "always wants to have the last word" and "argumentative". See! There's a reason why I'm those things! It's because I'm a smarty pants! I have "straight A" report cards to prove it!
Dislikes noise and chaos...Well I have no idea where this one came from. I love noise and chaos! If my car is too quiet, I bump my music. I also love going out to the local club and enjoying the music, or to the movies, to be up close and personal with the effects.
Eager...Hmmm...am I eager? I guess if I know something special is coming my way. Other than that, I like to take one day at a time.
Hardworking...Yes, yes, yes...this is one of my downfalls. I always go to work (unless I am positively not capable) and do my job! I didn't get perfect attentance in school for 6 years straight for nothing. I do my best at everything I try. If only, I could keep some of that "Hardworking" at home and do all the things that need to be done. :(
Loyal...One of my better qualities. I try really hard to be there for those I care about, and I would do anything in my power to help someone in need. I can keep secrets with the best of them, and I defend my own.
Beautiful...You know...I'm short and fat...yet I still get hit on by guys. That must be saying alot about my face.
Easy to talk to...Too much so. I hear way too many things that I don't wanna hear.
Hard to please...Not so! I am very easily pleased! Unless it's in a relationship, then yes, I am hard to please. I expect a lot out of someone who I share my life with.
Harsh...I've been told that I can be, although I don't purposely set out to be so.
Practical and very fussy...I like things done a certain way. Is that so wrong???
Pessimistic...Well............I have spent a good part of my life being so. But I really try hard to see the glass half full now days. Well, I take that back! What's up with that metaphor anyways? It has a very easy answer...if you fill an empty glass only half way, then it's half full. If it was full to begin with, and you drink half of it, it's half empty. Does seeing it as half empty, really make you a pessimist?
Just some thoughts
It is NOT ok, to belittle people and rip them apart! Don't you just hate when you know people like this? You see them do it time and time again, and you can't stop it from happening because you know that's just the kind of person that they are? I see it constantly on forums, where people who haven't even met face to face, are making it a goal to rip people to shreds.
I have a family member who has been ripped to shreds every since he was a small child, too young to understand what was happening to him. Everytime he talked, he got evil mean glares from everyone. Whenever he tried to get "congratulations" for someone, he was told that what he did was nothing spectacular. He was looked down apon, simply I gather, because he was the only male child in the family. I know it hurt him, it hurt me just seeing it happen to him. Had I been older, I would have said something, or asked questions to bring these peoples' actions out in the open. Unfortunately, this happened clear into his adulthood. He was an outcast, for no reason of his own. Finally, he started saying things back and he hurt those who treated him badly, so badly, that they have now disowned him.
How is that fair? How can people see their own actions as being righteous, yet when someone gives them a taste of their own medicine, instantly they hate that person for dishing out exactly what they've been doing all along? It's such an injustice, and the sad fact is, if no one does retaliate, then the person continues to do it. It's almost worth the consquences that follow.
I, myself, have my own scars. I was always one of those kids who would take whatever was handed to me, and I would swallow it. I refused to stand up for myself, so in a way, "I" was the reason that I was hurt. I had a friend who's soul reason for being my friend seemed to be, to bring me down. It's no secret that I grew up kinda poor, and I didn't get a lot of new things, or get to go out and spend money needlessly. When my mother bought me something new, it really meant something to me. It had sentimental value and I cherished it, regardless of the price. When I would show my friend what I got, she would tell me that it was nothing special, or she would roll her eyes at my excitement. I remember this one time, a boy asked me out at the park. I was sooooo happy, even though I turned him down. I was the cute little chubby girl that boys didn't ask out. On our way home, I told her about it...and her response to me was that he probably didn't even mean it...that it had been a joke. Talk about being crushed. Boys were always a problem for us. Everytime I liked a new boy, she would tell me that they were stupid or I was stupid, or that I had no chance with them, or I would get those famous rolling eyes. I knew deep down that I probably had no chance with any of these guys, but I always felt like she should have tried to be supportive. Once when we were younger, I found out that one of her boyfriends was only going out with her, because he liked me and knew I wouldn't date him. I NEVER told her about that because I didn't want to hurt her. She was a really good friend most of the time though. I figured that because we were so close, being "truthful" wasn't a bad thing. Then it happened...things have a way of building up inside of a person, waiting for that one tiny little crack of chance to escape. I was having a bad time, and life took a turn, where she was constantly telling me about her problems. I ended up telling her exactly what I thought about her situation and ways I thought she could better it. I truly wanted to help her, but I guess I lashed out some. It's not like I intended to be harsh, I just figured that being honest wouldn't be a problem between us, since she never held back. Do I regret it today? Of course I do. But unfortunately, after something has been said or done, you can't erase that it happened.
Now I see my mom doing it, and it bothers me alot. She has never liked my younger cousin, and she has always belittled him, and you can just tell it in the way she talks about him and to him. He was spoiled as a child and there was a lot of favortism as far as my grandmother was concerned, so she holds a lot of that against him. Even though he is now 21, she still will not let things rest. He's grown up a lot, I can see it...I just hate the fact that she refuses to see it. Nothing he does is good enough, nothing he says is right. I see this going down the same path that my other relative went down, and in the end, a lot of hurt can only come from it. I've tried to say stuff, but she constantly has an excuse for it. It's just not fair. I hope that she can stop it before she causes a bigger rift in the family.
As they say...what goes around, comes around. It's important for your happiness and those around you, if you can't say something nice to someone or you just want to bring them down, stop socializing with them. Cut the ties that will inevitably make everyone miserable, and as Thumper's momma always said...If you can't say something nice, don't say nothing at all.
I have a family member who has been ripped to shreds every since he was a small child, too young to understand what was happening to him. Everytime he talked, he got evil mean glares from everyone. Whenever he tried to get "congratulations" for someone, he was told that what he did was nothing spectacular. He was looked down apon, simply I gather, because he was the only male child in the family. I know it hurt him, it hurt me just seeing it happen to him. Had I been older, I would have said something, or asked questions to bring these peoples' actions out in the open. Unfortunately, this happened clear into his adulthood. He was an outcast, for no reason of his own. Finally, he started saying things back and he hurt those who treated him badly, so badly, that they have now disowned him.
How is that fair? How can people see their own actions as being righteous, yet when someone gives them a taste of their own medicine, instantly they hate that person for dishing out exactly what they've been doing all along? It's such an injustice, and the sad fact is, if no one does retaliate, then the person continues to do it. It's almost worth the consquences that follow.
I, myself, have my own scars. I was always one of those kids who would take whatever was handed to me, and I would swallow it. I refused to stand up for myself, so in a way, "I" was the reason that I was hurt. I had a friend who's soul reason for being my friend seemed to be, to bring me down. It's no secret that I grew up kinda poor, and I didn't get a lot of new things, or get to go out and spend money needlessly. When my mother bought me something new, it really meant something to me. It had sentimental value and I cherished it, regardless of the price. When I would show my friend what I got, she would tell me that it was nothing special, or she would roll her eyes at my excitement. I remember this one time, a boy asked me out at the park. I was sooooo happy, even though I turned him down. I was the cute little chubby girl that boys didn't ask out. On our way home, I told her about it...and her response to me was that he probably didn't even mean it...that it had been a joke. Talk about being crushed. Boys were always a problem for us. Everytime I liked a new boy, she would tell me that they were stupid or I was stupid, or that I had no chance with them, or I would get those famous rolling eyes. I knew deep down that I probably had no chance with any of these guys, but I always felt like she should have tried to be supportive. Once when we were younger, I found out that one of her boyfriends was only going out with her, because he liked me and knew I wouldn't date him. I NEVER told her about that because I didn't want to hurt her. She was a really good friend most of the time though. I figured that because we were so close, being "truthful" wasn't a bad thing. Then it happened...things have a way of building up inside of a person, waiting for that one tiny little crack of chance to escape. I was having a bad time, and life took a turn, where she was constantly telling me about her problems. I ended up telling her exactly what I thought about her situation and ways I thought she could better it. I truly wanted to help her, but I guess I lashed out some. It's not like I intended to be harsh, I just figured that being honest wouldn't be a problem between us, since she never held back. Do I regret it today? Of course I do. But unfortunately, after something has been said or done, you can't erase that it happened.
Now I see my mom doing it, and it bothers me alot. She has never liked my younger cousin, and she has always belittled him, and you can just tell it in the way she talks about him and to him. He was spoiled as a child and there was a lot of favortism as far as my grandmother was concerned, so she holds a lot of that against him. Even though he is now 21, she still will not let things rest. He's grown up a lot, I can see it...I just hate the fact that she refuses to see it. Nothing he does is good enough, nothing he says is right. I see this going down the same path that my other relative went down, and in the end, a lot of hurt can only come from it. I've tried to say stuff, but she constantly has an excuse for it. It's just not fair. I hope that she can stop it before she causes a bigger rift in the family.
As they say...what goes around, comes around. It's important for your happiness and those around you, if you can't say something nice to someone or you just want to bring them down, stop socializing with them. Cut the ties that will inevitably make everyone miserable, and as Thumper's momma always said...If you can't say something nice, don't say nothing at all.
Happy Valentine's Day!
Can you believe that I forgot that Valentine's Day was coming up. Mark asked me about it on Tuesday and I had absolutely no idea what he was talking about, he had to remind me that it was in two days. Oh well, it's not like Valentine's is a big day for us anyway. We usually do nice things for/with each other throughout the year, so this is just like any other day for us. But we usually get each other a card, a small gift, and go out to dinner. Tonight, I think we'll skip the card and gift, and just go out for dinner and a movie. :)
I hope that you all have a wonderful day with your special person! May the love flow far and wide...
I hope that you all have a wonderful day with your special person! May the love flow far and wide...
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
It's been 8 days already???
I've been gone for a while, but I had no idea it was over a week since I last visited here. Wow, does time fly by or what? So...where do I begin?
As of the last I heard, I have officially been referred to Providence Saint Joseph's Hospital in Burbank for the surgery. Just waiting to hear from the surgeon. I'm beginning to think that I may have to call and ask my doctor for an extension of medical leave. I was hoping that by this time I woul dhave been well on my way to recovery, but I guess time wasn't with me. BUT this month off has allowed me to catch up on rest, and do a lot of research. I can honestly say that I think I have been able to combat most of the pain, so long as I'm able to relax at the earliest signs of discomfort. Being at work doesn't allow me that priveledge, so I end up suffering.
Hmm...I had lunch, or I should say Dinner, last Friday night with a very dear friend. It was wonderful to see her and catch up in our lives. I met Margaret at Sizzlers at 6 pm, and we sat and talked until 8:30, even though we just picked at our food the whole time. She is the sweetest person you could wish to know, and she's the reason I survived working in Hell. Haha, inside joke! Margaret was my immediate supervisor when I worked out at Youth Services, and we became pretty good friends. I was one of her favorite employees, so of course, that made work a lot easier for me. ;) I lost touch with her for a while, but after only seeing each other once in a blue moon over the past 3 years, we've finally rekindled our friendship. I've gotta be honest, I don't have many friends anymore (well besides all my peeps on the internet), but no one that I run around with (seems like that keeps me out of trouble anyways). Mark and I are best friends, and truthfully, it's hard to go out and do things with other people, although I know it's good for both of us. But we do EVERYTHING together, so alot of times, it feels ackward to be without him. But having a woman to hang out with is awesome. Mark wasn't too heartbroken over a night without me either....him and my brother went to the movies.
We found out Saterday, that my brother's cat has diabetes. It sucks because Wicket is his pride and joy. He was told that he needs to put him on insulin, but my brother doesn't want to leave in him the vet's for several days, so that they could monitor him and the right doses to give him. Especially since the vet said that if he is given too much, he'll die, and if he's given too little, he can go into insulin shock. That didn't go over too well. So now, my brother is trying to feed him a raw diet, to see how that works. I've read wonderful things about it online, but it's one of those things where if it isn't successful, then he'll have to start the insulin anyways. But it kinda urks me because I did hours apon hours of research online about the feline diabetes, and everything said to stop feeding cheap dry cat food. I stressed this to my brother, had him read it for himself, and he said that he would do it for Wicket's health. I come over today, and guess what's in his food bowl. I give up!
Draco isn't eating too much either right now. Every winter she does this, but I think this year has been the worst. I think it has to do with the weather changing, but for all I know, she might be getting ready to lay eggs. I hear they starve themselves before doing that.
I had to go and have a root canal done today. That was fun! :) But I think that's pretty muchly all that's been going on. Oh wait...I did go to a health food store yesterday and bought some supplies to boost up my immune system. The sad thing is...I actually like the flavor of the stuff I bought. I got some Aloe Vera juice, and some Noni/Goji/Mangosteen/Acai juice, and some probiotics. Who would have thought that I'd become a health nut??? Before you know it, I'll be doing yoga and sipping herbal tea. :P
As of the last I heard, I have officially been referred to Providence Saint Joseph's Hospital in Burbank for the surgery. Just waiting to hear from the surgeon. I'm beginning to think that I may have to call and ask my doctor for an extension of medical leave. I was hoping that by this time I woul dhave been well on my way to recovery, but I guess time wasn't with me. BUT this month off has allowed me to catch up on rest, and do a lot of research. I can honestly say that I think I have been able to combat most of the pain, so long as I'm able to relax at the earliest signs of discomfort. Being at work doesn't allow me that priveledge, so I end up suffering.
Hmm...I had lunch, or I should say Dinner, last Friday night with a very dear friend. It was wonderful to see her and catch up in our lives. I met Margaret at Sizzlers at 6 pm, and we sat and talked until 8:30, even though we just picked at our food the whole time. She is the sweetest person you could wish to know, and she's the reason I survived working in Hell. Haha, inside joke! Margaret was my immediate supervisor when I worked out at Youth Services, and we became pretty good friends. I was one of her favorite employees, so of course, that made work a lot easier for me. ;) I lost touch with her for a while, but after only seeing each other once in a blue moon over the past 3 years, we've finally rekindled our friendship. I've gotta be honest, I don't have many friends anymore (well besides all my peeps on the internet), but no one that I run around with (seems like that keeps me out of trouble anyways). Mark and I are best friends, and truthfully, it's hard to go out and do things with other people, although I know it's good for both of us. But we do EVERYTHING together, so alot of times, it feels ackward to be without him. But having a woman to hang out with is awesome. Mark wasn't too heartbroken over a night without me either....him and my brother went to the movies.
We found out Saterday, that my brother's cat has diabetes. It sucks because Wicket is his pride and joy. He was told that he needs to put him on insulin, but my brother doesn't want to leave in him the vet's for several days, so that they could monitor him and the right doses to give him. Especially since the vet said that if he is given too much, he'll die, and if he's given too little, he can go into insulin shock. That didn't go over too well. So now, my brother is trying to feed him a raw diet, to see how that works. I've read wonderful things about it online, but it's one of those things where if it isn't successful, then he'll have to start the insulin anyways. But it kinda urks me because I did hours apon hours of research online about the feline diabetes, and everything said to stop feeding cheap dry cat food. I stressed this to my brother, had him read it for himself, and he said that he would do it for Wicket's health. I come over today, and guess what's in his food bowl. I give up!
Draco isn't eating too much either right now. Every winter she does this, but I think this year has been the worst. I think it has to do with the weather changing, but for all I know, she might be getting ready to lay eggs. I hear they starve themselves before doing that.
I had to go and have a root canal done today. That was fun! :) But I think that's pretty muchly all that's been going on. Oh wait...I did go to a health food store yesterday and bought some supplies to boost up my immune system. The sad thing is...I actually like the flavor of the stuff I bought. I got some Aloe Vera juice, and some Noni/Goji/Mangosteen/Acai juice, and some probiotics. Who would have thought that I'd become a health nut??? Before you know it, I'll be doing yoga and sipping herbal tea. :P
Monday, February 4, 2008
Hallelujah!!!
Just talked to my doctor's office. :) Sounds like they are finally on their game...maybe the SuperBowl rubbed off on them. My results are in, they have contacted the insurance company and now we are waiting to hear back, to see who I'll be assigned to now (in Loma Linda). Sounds like things are going to start happening pretty fast now. I'm eager, anxious and scared all at the same time.
Was I the only one who didn't watch the Super Bowl yesterday? I still don't know who won, or even who was playing for that matter. I am not a big fan of sports, although I have recently found out that I love watching the Winter Olympics (Snowboarding is awesome!). It's a good thing I wasn't all into the game because we had BAD winds here yesterday (some 60 miles per hour) and we kept losing electricity. I bet a lot of people were feeling a whole lot of anger. Not me, I sat in the house and watched movies all day. Not a bad way to spend a Sunday afternoon. :)
Was I the only one who didn't watch the Super Bowl yesterday? I still don't know who won, or even who was playing for that matter. I am not a big fan of sports, although I have recently found out that I love watching the Winter Olympics (Snowboarding is awesome!). It's a good thing I wasn't all into the game because we had BAD winds here yesterday (some 60 miles per hour) and we kept losing electricity. I bet a lot of people were feeling a whole lot of anger. Not me, I sat in the house and watched movies all day. Not a bad way to spend a Sunday afternoon. :)
Friday, February 1, 2008
Just venting
Gotta make this quick and get it all out. I am soooooo mad at Mark right now! Long story short, he did drugs a few years before we met. He got into trouble, went to court but never finished his drug classes at that time. 12 years go by, and I happen to find a court website and it says that Mark has warrents out for his arrest, because he never finished those classes. We hire a lawyer (over $2,000) and Mark was told he had to start the classes all over again and complete them. When he finished them, he was supposed to send the letter of completion to his lawyer, and he would then go to the courts and furnish it to them so that all charges would be dropped. (12 years after he got into trouble!!!) Mark went to a total of 29 classes, well over $400, and was finished with them all in early December. I told him that he needed to send the letter to his lawyer, and he told me that the guy in charge of the drug classes, was going to do it. I've bugged him numberous times, to call his lawyer and make sure that he received the paperwork and that everything was finished for good now. But would he do it??? NOOOOOOO.....
Today, curiousity got the best of me, and I went back and looked at that court page. (Insert a "someone's gonna die" smiley face here). Mark now has a bench warrent reinstated because no one has furnished the court with the letter of completion. I am beyond pissed!!! Stupid lawyer, stupid drug class and STUPID MARK!!!! He deserves to get pulled over and arrested, just because he was stupid and wasn't responsible enough to take care of his own problems. Would it have hurt to make one simple tiny little phone call to make sure that everything was taken care of? Or what was still needed? UGHHHHHHH.............................................................not a good way to start out the weekend. I try to lead a very unstressful life, but it seems like everything is trying to work against me. :(
Today, curiousity got the best of me, and I went back and looked at that court page. (Insert a "someone's gonna die" smiley face here). Mark now has a bench warrent reinstated because no one has furnished the court with the letter of completion. I am beyond pissed!!! Stupid lawyer, stupid drug class and STUPID MARK!!!! He deserves to get pulled over and arrested, just because he was stupid and wasn't responsible enough to take care of his own problems. Would it have hurt to make one simple tiny little phone call to make sure that everything was taken care of? Or what was still needed? UGHHHHHHH.............................................................not a good way to start out the weekend. I try to lead a very unstressful life, but it seems like everything is trying to work against me. :(
I amaze myself!
Everyone who knows me, knows that since I was a teenager, I've vowed never to cook. I never had the patience to stand in the kitchen chopping and mixing things up. I even gave Mark fair warning when we became an item, that he would not get too many home cooked meals, unless he made them. I've always been one of those "If it's frozen, I can warm it up" kind of people. I have ate fast food so many times, that I literally shutter at the thought of eating out (unless of course it's Quiznos). Come to think about it...no wonder why I'm fat. :P It's not that I can't cook, it's that I don't wanna cook. I'm somewhat picky, so anything that dealt with raw garlic, onion or peppers was out of the question, wasn't gonna touch them, no way no how. And celery? My mom had to stop cooking with it when I was 7 because it's smell made me get really horrid headaches. I've steered clear of any celery ever sense, unless it was well cooked.
Then about 3 months ago, I got the crazy notion that I wanted to make home made meals. I collected about 400 easy recipes (thank God for the internet) and slowly but surely, I've started cooking. There's only been one meal that was gross, but it was the recipe....not me. ;D I just made stir-fry, and I impressed even myself. It was the all time best stir-fry I've ever eatten, and I even stood in the kitchen for over two hours preparing it. I've even began cooking with everything (onions, peppers, garlic). I even went against my better judgement and allowed Mark to buy some raw celery, which I cut up about four nights ago, to put in my homemade veggie soup. The smell still bothered me a bit but no headache. It's a miracle!!!! :)
Wow, after 27 years, who would have guessed I'd take this up? :]
Then about 3 months ago, I got the crazy notion that I wanted to make home made meals. I collected about 400 easy recipes (thank God for the internet) and slowly but surely, I've started cooking. There's only been one meal that was gross, but it was the recipe....not me. ;D I just made stir-fry, and I impressed even myself. It was the all time best stir-fry I've ever eatten, and I even stood in the kitchen for over two hours preparing it. I've even began cooking with everything (onions, peppers, garlic). I even went against my better judgement and allowed Mark to buy some raw celery, which I cut up about four nights ago, to put in my homemade veggie soup. The smell still bothered me a bit but no headache. It's a miracle!!!! :)
Wow, after 27 years, who would have guessed I'd take this up? :]
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